March 2005 Tournament Results:

Gentlemen,

Now, I’m not saying that these results are late again, but I am writing this one day after the Masters tournament (traditionally held in April).  And, speaking of the Masters, what a tournament it was.  And, for the benefit of those of you who may live under a rock (or sailing the Mediterranean), it was a classic finish, with Chris DiMarco staging a gallant charge to the end to tie it up in regulation.  But, as always seems the case, with a birdie on just the first playoff hole, Marvin Marcus came out the winner.

Now on to our tournament (the fifth major).

This month’s format was a two-man scramble and I was, once again, sidelined by a severe knee sprain, the cause of which will forever remain a secret.  Although, I did have fun riding around embarrassing, er, rather, encouraging the teams.

The winners were determined by a team handicap and prizes were awarded to the first, second and third place low net teams.

First Place:  Shooting a team score of 55.2 was the dynamic duo of Everett McDonald and Tiger Woods.  (Actually, it was Everett and Marvin but I refuse to give him any more ink!)  Oh, wait … yes I will! … Dear Marvin, you have now caught the eye of our handicap committee and your handicap will be adjusted accordingly.  (Down.)  (Way down.)  (Way, way, down.)  Congratulations to you both, though.

Second Place:  Combining to shoot a 57.4 was the team of Stephen Takach and Tom Horst.  Now, is it just me, or has Stephen’s face been all over the local press lately?  Kudos, Stephen, to you, and the good Doctor.

Third Place:  Goes to the tag team of Randy Potter and David Freedman who posted a net 58.4 on the day.  And a nice gross score of 66, as well.  And Randy, you’re right … David is a lot easier to put up with after an early morning bloody mary.

And speaking of gross scores, honorable mention (that means no prizes, boys) goes to the father and son team of Roger and Greg Huxman.  They paired up to shoot the day’s low round of 63.

And speaking of Greg Huxman … I’m out there, just riding around watching the play, as I happen upon Team Huxman on the second tee.  And you know what the kid say’s to me?  He asks me to go around the dogleg and see if the green is clear.  If the GREEN is CLEAR?  On a 414 yard PAR FOUR?  Listen, Greg … just stay up there at Mississippi State and pick on people your own age.  No one here will miss you.

Closest-to-the-pin honors this month go to:

6th Hole:  Rodrigo Arboleda (9’10”)

12th Hole:  Patrick Simpson-Jones (8’8”)

Now boys, you both had reasonably make-able putts, and a partner who could give you the line with his putt from the same spot, and you could only card a par on the holes?  (Whew!  I’m not alone!)

Long Drive on Hole #14 went to (whom else?) Punk Huxman, who launched it out there 332 yards off the tee, thus basically closing that portion of the competition at 9:00am!  (Hey, maybe he knew what he was doing on 2)!  Ya know what, Greg … forget everything I’ve said.  Chicks dig the long ball!

And finally the moment we’ve all been waiting for.  This month’s newly created, yet highly coveted; “It Sounded like a Good Idea at the Time?” award goes to common-sense challenged, fellow member, Ken Forsyth, who, not only hung out with the hard core after the round, but for some totally unknown reason, decided it would be a good idea if he invited his new bride to the post-round festivities.

That’s all I want to say about the matter. (Other than any apologies I may have to extend to Kenny for my behavior).  But hey … SHE was ALL OVER ME!

Remember gents, we have a tournament this Saturday, so please click on the above tab to register.  (That would be the one that says “Tournament Registration”, Ken.)  Geeze!

Once again, we thank you for your continued support of our association, because, without you, it would be, well, let’s see … I guess one member less.)

See you all on the course.

Bill Hayes

El Presidente Punctualissimo Maximo

p.s. Staff photographer, Bob Alt, will not be at the April tourney.  Someone, PLEASE bring a digital camera and record the round for posterior.